this is funny
One friend was thrilled to hear the new Furby had arrived—she wanted but never got one as a kid in 1998—so she volunteered for five days of robot-sitting and reported back the following:
- Day 1: Furby wakes up and is playful and nice but won’t shut up. People at work instantly hate me so I put him in a drawer. Furby burped and sang in my purse on the train and generally embarrassed me as much as I imagine a real baby would.
- Day 2: Furby sleeps through the night and all day the next day. I wake him up at 10 to feed him and he is PISSED. His eyes turn into flames whenever I touch him. So, as punishment, I feed him until his eyes go all swirly and he “barfs” repeatedly. I make him go to sleep.
- Day 3: Furby undergoes a “change” after I pull his tail rapidly about 40 times. His eyes turn into cows and he says “I CHANNNGGINNNNGGGGG” followed by wild vibrations and seizure-inducing eye flashes. When that’s done Furby has a new voice. He says, “What’s up dude”. At this point I hate Furby, and I throw him on the floor. He eventually sings himself to sleep.
- Day 4: I ignore Furby all day.
- Day 5: I put Furby in a cooler and bring him back. Fuck Furby. I hate him. The instructions that we got warned that there is no on/off switch and we should have read that and never turned it on.”